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8 posts categorized "Shunning"

November 29, 2007

Leaving the Amish behind

In 2003 Melvin Mullet chose to leave his Amish upbringing behind, and in this interview he explains some basics of Amish life as well as offering a little insight on how he sees the group, now that he is 'on the outside'.
Melvin_mullet_formerly_amish

One of the pluses of Amish life, according to Melvin, who grew up in Michigan:  'I miss the closeness of the community. If something happens to one Amish family, everybody is there to help. I miss that interaction of community.'

On the other hand, now that Melvin is no longer Amish, he feels his upbringing 'has worked to my disadvantage because I did not receive formal schooling.'

It's not immediately clear but it sounds like Melvin chose to leave before being baptized.  In this case he would not be shunned by his community. 

In reality, do Amish parents treat the children who choose not to be baptized differently from those that do?  Perhaps some do.  Having a lot of children stay in the faith is generally admired in the community. 

October 12, 2007

An Illinois shunning story: did these Amish go too far?

Shunning. One of the sorest points of contention when Jakob Amman tore away from his Mennonite kin back in 1693. Still controversial today.

Meidung is the word the Amish use for it. Shunning is one of those things that have continued to define the Amish against their Mennonite cousins, and against the world at large.  If asked, the man on the street will be able to tell you what shunning is all about, at least in some vague way.  It shows up in pop interpretations of the Amish all the time, after all (i.e., see last week's Cold CaseOr, better yet, don't.)

But did you know that different Amish apply shunning to differing degrees?

Amish_buggy_geauga

One form of shunning--let’s call it the ‘lighter’ version--allows an erring member to have the Bann removed if he or she becomes a member in good standing in a related Anabaptist church.

This exempts the leaver from making a confession in order to have the ban lifted. This type of shunning is more common in Midwestern communities, such as large portions of Holmes/Wayne County, Ohio, and among the ‘non-Swiss’ Amish of northern Indiana.

Streng Meidung (strong shunning) refers to a more strict form of shunning, where the errant person is under the Bann for life, unless he or she makes a full confession before the church and fixes what caused the trouble in the first place.

Lancaster County, the Swartzentrubers, the Nebraska Amish, and according to Steven Nolt and Thomas Meyers in An Amish Patchwork, the Andy Weaver Church of Holmes County are among those that stick to Streng Meidung.


And that's not all--there are a host of smaller settlements scattered throughout the country that adhere to Streng Meidung--such as the one that I had a chance to visit in 2004, in an isolated corner of Illinois.

The dark side

This particular settlement, which I’ll leave unnamed, in many ways is not so unlike the myriad other smaller, conservative-leaning settlements formed by members leaving larger communities in search of stricter living.

Off the beaten path. Noticeably poorer. Homes somewhat ramshackle--peeling paint, missing siding, some families living in shop buildings.  The local furniture outfits--dusty, dreary, and a little dead--certainly not cranking like the spanky shops of the Amish around Arthur, the state’s centerpiece settlement.   People, on the whole, just seem a bit more wary of outsiders.

Nebraska_amish_house

I did manage to talk to quite a few of them though. Though I was a bit puzzled when one fellow urged me not to talk to another family up the road--whom I thought was of his church.  When I pressed him as to why, he refused to elaborate.

On meeting aforementioned family, I learned that they had been excommunicated. And I started to get a picture of how shunning works in this particular settlement.

Later, as I spoke with two other families who had jumped ship along with the first, I was a shocked to hear them complain of harassment, even vandalism, perpetrated under cover of night by their former church kin. It seemed a bit un-Christian.  It seemed a bit, umm, juvenile.

I had never come across that sort of extreme treatment of former members before. Pretty primitive. Combine that with practices such as the use of outdoor privies, common in this particular settlement, and you can see why some Amish get labeled ‘backward’.

Amish_family

As I met other members of the community while selling books that day, it became more and more clear that this bunch was a different drink of water than the more mainstream Arthur folks. The leavers, however, were extremely open and frank about their situation. I remember thinking that it just seemed a healthier way to be.  Here were three families of the same stock as the rest, but now able to basically be themselves.  Unleashed, in a way.  They seemed happy.

But when speaking with either side, you could almost feel the unseen wall that prevented any seeing eye-to-eye. 

One of the families had actually responded to the harrassment, in a way--by painting a short Bible verse on the tree in their front yard, visible from the road.  To be honest, I can't recall the exact verse, but I remember the message of it being poignant for the situation they were in.  It was something which seemed to be directed towards their former church brothers and sisters, if I'm not mistaken, something along the lines of being blind to the error of one's ways.  In any case, that seemed to be the extent of communication between the two sides at that point. 

Vandalism and Bible verses painted on trees.


Meidung done us in

In a true 'our-way-or-the-highway' situation, three families chose the highway out in backwoods Illinois. I find myself wondering if any others out there have left since then.

The logic of a Streng Meidung is easy to see. Cutting off the stray sheep isolates and protects the remaining members. It inflicts emotional pain on the shunned, hopefully forcing them to rethink and rejoin. Tough love on a community-wide scale.

At the same time, for the thinking and feeling ones among those that remain, such extreme treatment could backfire.

The shunning mechanism has been called (by the Amish themselves) a key factor in the church's phenomenal growth. Others note that the practice has resulted in great schisms over the years. I won’t knock shunning--I think it can have a place in counter-cultural Christian communities like that of the Amish.

It’s just that when you get around the edges, things can get a little dodgy.

Just like anywhere else in society, I suppose.

October 05, 2007

My husband left the Amish; see Bella

On yesterday's husband and wife issue, I came across an old post on what happens when one partner leaves the Amish, while the other stays behind.  Click the link for more.


If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans

Also, I was fortunate enough to be invited to a screening of a new film last night.  What does this have to do with the Amish?  Not much, except that they would agree strongly with the message of the film.  The name is Bella, and it is going to be released October 26.  Take a friend and go see it.  Click here to find out more about it.  Well-acted, funny, and moving, while avoiding preachiness.  Could it be the next Passion of the Christ?

Bella_film_movie_beach_photo

July 29, 2007

Assurance of salvation-a thorny issue

Cimg7911

This week while selling books in Lancaster County, I met 'Abe' and 'Anna Ruth', an excommunicated Amish couple, kicked out for promoting the idea of assurance of salvation.

While they still attended their local church services, lived and dressed 'Amish', they had lost full membership and were presumably under the Bann.

Amish believe that all we can do is do our best to live lives of faith and hope to be accepted into heaven.  Abe, a 20-something dairy farmer, shared the doubts and terrors he struggled with during his early life before coming to the conclusion that acceptance of Christ's supreme sacrifice alone was enough to affirm his place in the afterlife.

Abe's staunch conviction impressed me.  He was a very thoughtful fellow and challenged me on my beliefs, something uncommon among non-evangelizing 'standard' Amish. 

Abe insisted that we pray together before I left.  I was moved that he seemed genuinely concerned about the well-being of my soul. 

Regardless of any differences in our individual beliefs, I was grateful to have met him.  During a hectic day filled with menial concerns and worldly distractions, he helped bring my focus back to what was really important.

May 14, 2007

Leaving

When a baptized Amish person leaves the community for another church, it can be a jarring experience, both for the family involved and for others in the church. 

And especially so, in the very rare occurrence when one party stays behind.

Most cases I have come across of Amish leaving have involved the full family;  one or two peculiar situations have not--with the wife remaining Amish.

Amish_children_2_2Awkward situations can arise, to say the least, with only part of the family 'Amish', part buggying to church on Sundays with father remaining home, for example. 

It can be traumatic for kids who wonder why they can't have church service at their homes, and for the mother who has to answer their questions, perhaps forced to face a seeping social stigma from within her own community.

 

photo: illinoisfamily.org

 

An excerpt from Brad Igou's The Amish In Their Own Words reveals the struggle:

We never discussed his leaving the church;  he just went.  What a shock it was!  I was so ashamed to say that I did as Satan wanted me to do:  I quit praying.  There were no arguments between my husband and myself, but I was drifting right along with him, although I still went to our church.  Then God held me back from taking that step [of leaving the Amish]...


The mere discomfort of awkward family gatherings would pale in comparison to what many Amish would consider a far more important matter:  the well-being of the self-exiled person's soul. 

Amish vary in opinion on those who leave and join other churches;  one solution, acceptable to some, has it that an Amish person who leaves but joins a similarly-minded (ie Mennonite) church, and makes a confession, will avoid being shunned

Others may simply refuse to shun family members who have left.  This despite the idea that perhaps the greatest measure of 'success' in this non-individualistic society is the number of your children who choose church membership.


For some, the numbers don't matter as much as maintaining closeness with their loved ones, regardless of the faith they've chosen, regardless of the fact that they've broken a vow.


Yet others will be shunned--and hard--by father, brother, sister, mother, for years.

April 29, 2007

An Amish killer's attempt to return


The crime was horrendous.

But the point now is not the crime--it's the hard issues at hand for the Amish community of Ed Gingerich--allegedly the only Amishman ever tried and convicted for the death of another human being. 

Gingerich killed his wife in a fit of insanity in 1993. 

A paranoid schizophrenic, he was convicted of involuntary manslaughter and served a few years in a prison psychiatric ward.  He was released in 1998 and moved to Harmony Haven, an Amish-run retreat and mental home in Michigan.
Ed_gingerich_amish_killer
photo:  Tom Boyle, Titusville Herald
While the practice of shunning gets a lot of attention from outsiders, Amish belief also includes an important provision for forgiveness.

The process for getting back in shape looks like this, in a nutshell:  errant members confess and can be reinstated after showing repentance and a change of heart.

But as Dr. Steven Nolt of Goshen College says that the process 'more supposes someone who buys a car' than someone who commits such a heinously violent act. 

Amish in Gingerich's small northwestern PA community are terrified of him.  Sympathetic others, including outsiders, support what they see as his attempt at reconciliation.

His community's bishop has excommunicated members who have contact with him, including two of his brothers.  Members of Gingerich's family have been accused of harassing others in the church, causing some to move away. 

Gingerich has received particular sympathy from some members of the New Order Amish, who preach a more personal form of spirituality.  After his wife's killing, Gingerich was quartered in Harmony Haven, a Michigan mental home for Amish and Mennonites.  It was there that he came into contact with the New Order.

"I love Ed immensely. I've prayed with the man. I've cried with the man" said one New Order supporter.

Should Gingerich have a shot at redemption, as many say he should?  Do the wishes of his community, some of whom asked that he be 'locked up forever' count for more than the state's judgment? 

Are outsiders, including more progressive New Order Amish, overstepping their bounds by advocating so strongly for Gingerich?

I won't go further, but this article in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, where I've taken a lot of the facts on the case from, is a thought-provoking look at a thankfully rare situation in the Amish world.

April 15, 2007

A quick look at shunning


1) Shunning only happens among baptized members.  That means youth can go off during Rumspringa and 'break the rules'.   That means that some buy cars, wear 'English' clothes, and so on. 

If they cross the line too blatantly, they may get a 'talking-to', but they won't be placed under the Ban.  That's simply not how it works--you cannot shun a non-member.

When you are baptized, though, you make an adult commitment and that entails acceptance of the consequences if you break the rules which you've agreed to follow. 


2) Communities handle shunning differently.  Some are very strict about it.  Others less so.  Typical aspects of shunning include not being able to share a meal at the same table (the shunned often eat at the children's table) and not being able to directly transact business with members in good standing. 



Talking with shunned Amish, you can often sense the pain and bitterness lying under the surface.  Some have likened the experience to becoming a 'non-person'.

The Amish say they shun out of love for the errant member.  They want him to see his mistakes and return to the fold.

Others see shunning as key to the incredible growth the group has experienced.  As a social check, the idea of losing contact with your whole world is pretty strong motivation to toe the line. 

Today, around 80-90% of Amish children choose to join the church.   The Amish population doubles approximately once every 20 years. 

January 15, 2007

In Their Own Words

Lancaster_buggy_landscape

A few years ago a fantastic book was published, entitled The Amish In Their Own Words, edited by Brad Igou of Amish Country News.

Brad combed through 25 years of Amish writings in Family Life magazine, putting together a collection of Amish wisdom, history, and explanations of why they do the things they do, all written from an Old Order standpoint.

If you've ever wondered how Amish women feel about having so many children, what shunning is really all about, or if the Amish have a sense of humor (they do), it's a great book to check out. 

In Their Own Words reveals the real people behind the image.