Amish America

Getting my kicks in Lancaster County, PA

Well, despite the inclement weather, I managed to get up to Lancaster County and to my friends 'Daniel' and 'Mary', where I'll be staying the next few days.  The last hour-and-a-half or so, from the PA line onward, was pretty hairy, as snow and ice accumulation made driving tricky. 

I pulled in late Tuesday night to Daniel's, happy and relieved to see the kitchen gas-lamp still burning.  Daniel sat at the table, playing with the youngest child, a 14-month old girl.  The rest of the tribe, save Mary, were already fast asleep. 

Daniel set me up in the basement, which sounds cold, but is probably the warmest spot in the house--that's where the coal oven resides.  Before hitting the hay, Daniel pointed out the large reserves of canned food the family had been going through that winter. 

Pickled cauliflower, beets, 'snitz', canned meat, and all sorts of home-grown treats lined a full wall of the basement.  Being February, a good chunk of the eatin' had been knocked out already, as evidenced by numerous empty Mason jars, but quite a bit remained.  Good, because I planned to be hungry.

Yesterday morning (Wednesday) my jobs were:  udder-cleaner and silage-sweeper.  I learned that some cows don't like me--or at least cows that haven't gotten a chance to know me, don't like me. 

More than a couple took kicks at my hands as I attempted to 'strip' them.

That sounds more exciting than it is--it's actually something like priming the pump, before the mechanical-suction milkers get put on.  A squeeze or two to get the milk going.  Or actually, I think it's more a pull.  Or maybe a combination of the two.  Daniel's son 'Tim' explained that cows are often a bit jumpy if they don't know you so well.  Well, I aim to make friends this week.  I will learn to strip you, cows.

Today I graduated to manure-sweeping duty, and also got to pass out food to all the hungry cows.  It was nice making them happy.  Some were impatient and tried to steal from the bin. 

While sweeping up manure, members of Daniel's family offered up encouragement.  'It's looking good Erik!', 'You're doing a good job!'  This significantly helped my self-esteem, and for that I am grateful.  If all else fails, at least I know I can sweep manure to a satisfactory level.

Daniel's 8-year-old son 'Elmer' and 12-year-old daughter 'Lizzie' then commandeered me to help out with their respective tasks, feeding the chickens and pigeons, and distributing milk-substitute to the calves. 

The youngest calf, a snow-white fellow just a week old, needed some encouragement.  We had to chase that little guy down and force his head into the bucket.  He really resisted, but once we got it in there, he gulped milk like that was what he'd really wanted to do all along.  Funny approach to eating.  Lizzie, who seems to make a pretty good boss, paid me with a Valentine's Kit-Kat bar after breakfast, saying I did a good job.

After some errands with Daniel, we headed back home and somehow I ended up plastered on the couch for an unplanned hour-and-a-half nap.  The 4am-and-up schedule takes a few days' getting used to.

On rising, I stumbled upstairs to find Mary and 'Bena', the oldest daughter, at work at the kitchen table.  Bena was writing a letter to a friend that had missed a social event the day before. 

Mary was busy at work with her prayer-covering.  She had earlier ironed it, and was now doing what she called petza--pinching, she explained.  This petza process, which requires a pick-like metal tool, apparently helps to maintain the Lancaster prayer-covering's distinctive heart-shape.

'This is probably something new for you,' said Mary.

'I've never worn one of those...yet,'  I replied.

Mary seemed to get a kick out of that. 

Interview Excerpt: An Amish builder on working moms, mortgages, and making car payments

One thing that I admire about the Amish is the value they place in maintaining a spirit of humility. 

When the idea comes up in conversation that the Amish are getting something right—for example, by the way that they live or the values they profess and adhere to--they are usually quick to deflect attention, reminding that ‘human nature is universal’, or that ‘we’re human too.’  They have their own problems and many seem to realize it. 

Yet at the same time, many Amish have strong convictions and ideas and don’t hesitate to express them.

In the following interview excerpt, an experienced Amish homebuilder shares a few ideas on home life, family, and money matters.

Workin' Out

‘For the most part amongst the Amish here, the women do not work out.,’ 'Marcus' explains.   ‘It’s frowned upon, and I agree with that idea.’

‘I build houses…all over the area.  And a lot of people, both husband and wife work outside the home.  And if they were satisfied with [it], they could really build themselves a house where they wouldn’t have to.’

‘You have both of them working, and they build a $350,000 house.  If combined they have enough income to build a $350,000 house, they would probably be just as happy with a $175,000 house, and keep Mom at home taking care of the kids.’

‘You know, no doubt in my mind that would solve a lot of the problems.  These kids come home, and I’ve been out there, I’ve seen ‘em.  These kids come home from school, there’s nobody there, they have too much idle time, and there’s nothing to do, and they get in trouble…’

‘Not all the people out there, because we build some small houses, you know, where people are scrambling to make ends meet...but then again, if people were more willing to sacrifice, instead of having two expensive vehicles out there, if they had the minimum they could get, and drive it ‘til it falls apart, instead of ‘til they find the next…’

‘And it’s a dead-end street, because you go out there and you buy a vehicle and you finance it and by the time you have it paid off it’s wore out, or people think it’s wore out.  And they trade it in, and refinance, and they always have vehicle payments.’

‘I think if people lived a little more conservatively, we’d all be better off…as a society,' Marcus summarizes.  'If Mom stayed at home, took care of the kids—less stress because they don’t have the big house payments to make, and lived in a little smaller house, but people tend to build a house as big as they absolutely can handle, and both of them have to work to make the payments.’

Stretched and strapped

‘Why do people build big houses?’  I ask.

‘I’ve built houses that were over half a million dollars, for people that borrowed every penny…yeah, they have the capital and they have the income to do it—the bank wouldn’t have given them the money if they didn’t.  But—two kids, three dogs.  They could have built a house, a real nice house, that cost $250,000.’

‘Why have all the stress of making the big house payment, when you could just as well maybe have, let’s say for example if you build a $250,000 house instead of a $550,000 house, and if you can make those payments, then make the same size payments—have that house paid off in five or six years.’

‘And then, instead of being strapped out for the next 30 years with these huge house payments—it just makes no sense.’

My husband left the Amish; see Bella

On yesterday's husband and wife issue, I came across an old post on what happens when one partner leaves the Amish, while the other stays behind.  Click the link for more.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans

Also, I was fortunate enough to be invited to a screening of a new film last night.  What does this have to do with the Amish?  Not much, except that they would agree strongly with the message of the film.  The name is Bella, and it is going to be released October 26.  Take a friend and go see it.  Click here to find out more about it.  Well-acted, funny, and moving, while avoiding preachiness.  Could it be the next Passion of the Christ?

A woman's place

...is where exactly?

In Amish America, the primary role of the woman as homemaker has held steady for generations.  But there have been signs in recent years and decades that that may be changing, if ever so slightly.

Typically, young Amish girls and women work until marriage.  They are schoolteachers, waitresses, or hired hands in English and Amish homes.  In recent years, however, they have increasingly been stepping into 'male' roles.

A significant portion of single women hold factory jobs in the large settlements of northern Indiana, laboring on RV assembly lines next to male counterparts.  Furniture shops employ young women, and not just in secretarial or bookkeeping roles--a number of finishing shop owners recently shared with me that they prefer young girls for the job of applying the final coating to finished pieces, citing an eye for detail and methodical nature as two benefits of female help.

 

But female employment can be tricky when it comes to turnover.  An Ohio wholesale business owner friend joked: 'one thing I've learned, you can't get 'em to sign a contract not to marry, not to have children, okay?'  Funny, but that is the reality.  Marriage and home duties usually end employment for most girls.

But it is not unheard of for Amish women to hold jobs even after marriage and kids.  One of my waitresses at the local diner in Goshen, Indiana was mother to two toddlers, picking up part time shifts once or twice a week.  Others, especially those with smaller families, will take on part-time or even full-time jobs.

Lancaster County, especially, has seen a number of women in the business-owner's role, either partnering with husbands or running their own--even employing a husband as help, as Kraybill and Nolt reveal in Amish Enterprise.  Pretzel shops, produce stands, and quilt stores are all businesses that Amish women run successfully today.

In The Truth in Word and Work, subtitled A Statement of Faith By Ministers and Brethren of Amish Churches of Holmes Co., Ohio, and Related Areas, the male/female issue is addressed.  'The husband has the major responsibility of directing the home for the glory of Christ.  He needs to have the proper relationship with Christ in submission and self-denial to glorify his Head.  He is the God-delegated authority over the woman and is responsible for her actions in the home and in society.'

Modern readers may scream 'sexist' at this sort of stuff, but after all, the Amish are Biblical fundamentalists in the purest sense of the term, and keeping that in mind, this shouldn't surprise.

In practice, however, the woman takes a very active role in the Amish home, and men will often consult with and even defer to their wives' wishes in many decisions concerning purchases and the home.  A good wife who runs a home well is highly respected.  Though the Amish woman cannot hold church office, she has equal voting rights in selecting new ministry and is able to voice her concerns before the church just as any man can.

The man as the head of the home--that idea makes feminists' skin crawl.  But let's be real about it.  In a number of Middle Eastern nations, the law sees the woman's worth as half that of a man's, after all.  Now that is something to be up in arms over.